4 Effects Your Parents’ Relationship Has On You

children holding hands with their parents

Your parents are, more likely than not, the first people you ever interact with in your life. They set your standard for everything — ranging from what values you develop to what your interests are — especially, what your relationships with others look like (both romantically and platonically).

Before you start dating, begin to think about starting to date, or even see characters dating in your favorite TV shows and movies, the first relationship you probably see is the one between your parents. This tells you a lot about what you later deem “normal” or “not normal” between romantic partners. In friendships, you may find yourself drawn to people who remind you of your parents for various reasons. Continue reading 4 Effects Your Parents’ Relationship Has On You

What Does It Mean To Be Emotionally Intelligent?

emotionally intelligent women hugging

Know someone who just can’t seem to understand anyone else’s point of view? Maybe they struggle to realize why people feel a certain way, or just can never read a room — well, they might have low emotional intelligence.

Attempting to understand why you feel a certain way can be challenging when the answer isn’t immediately apparent. While the skill comes more naturally to some than others, the ability to know and understand yourself on a deeper level is referred to as emotional intelligence (EI).

Emotional intelligence goes beyond just knowing your own emotions, but also involves having a higher awareness of the emotions of those around you and your ability to empathize with someone else’s situation. Continue reading What Does It Mean To Be Emotionally Intelligent?

How To Deal With Controlling People

hand controlling person

“No, this restaurant is better.”

“Why would you go that way? My way is faster.”

“I told you to tell me before you use the credit card.”

“You didn’t tell me you had plans with friends this weekend.”

Some of these statements may sound familiar. The trouble with controlling relationships is that they seem normal at first. Maybe that restaurant really is better or that route really is faster.

But when the corrections come at every turn, when your friend, partner, or even your supervisor questions every decision you make and dictates every action you take, you might be dealing with a controlling person. Continue reading How To Deal With Controlling People

When Does Emotional Attachment Become Unhealthy?

hands reaching for each other

Everyone feels some sort of attachment to people, things, or places. After all, if you have something good in your life, it makes sense that you might feel resistant to losing that person or thing. However, excessive emotional attachment is unhealthy when it begins to disrupt your life.

In the case of relationships, unhealthy emotional attachments can disrupt your partner’s life as well. The line between healthy and unhealthy attachments can be hard to figure out, however, especially if you don’t have a precedent for healthy relationships. If you have been in an abusive relationship before, it may be hard to adjust to a normal, healthy balance with your partner. Continue reading When Does Emotional Attachment Become Unhealthy?

How to Move Forward After Cheating, According to a Therapist

man and woman looking away

For as long as people have made promises to be faithful to their partners, people have been breaking those promises. Aside from the hurt that comes with infidelity, romantic partners — both the cheated and the cheated upon — may feel guilt, betrayal, anger, foolishness, and loss of trust.

And yet, people still do it. They do it even when they know it’s wrong, even when they said they won’t, and even though they might — or will — get caught. This begs two questions: The first is why, and the second is how do couples move forward if it happens? Continue reading How to Move Forward After Cheating, According to a Therapist

How to Avoid Destructive Behavior in Your Relationship

couple sitting on bench looking on phones

We see it all the time in movies, TV shows, with our friends, and maybe even with ourselves (guilty as charged) — people engaging in destructive behaviors in a relationship, thereby sabotaging it. The bad behavior takes a toll on the relationship, sometimes causing it to end, and the sabotager is left feeling heartbroken…even though, uh, it was kind of their own fault.

It’s pretty common for us humans to self-sabotage and not always in relationships, sometimes it’s our career, schooling, or general well-being. Sometimes, you don’t even realize you’re doing it, hurting ourselves (or others), until it’s too late. Continue reading How to Avoid Destructive Behavior in Your Relationship

11 Ways to Combat Boredom in a Relationship

couple sitting outside in chairs looking at each other

The harsh reality of long term relationships: Boredom hits.

As time goes by and the relationship’s honeymoon phase recedes further and further in the rearview mirror, it’s likely that the exciting chemistry you and your partner once had just isn’t as present anymore. You might find yourself on autopilot, in a monotonous routine with your partner, and next thing you know, you’re straight up bored.

When a relationship is newer, there tends to be more excitement. You’re experiencing a lot of firsts with your partner, sparks are flying, and you’re having fun. When a relationship is older, it’s common to experience boredom in some aspect of your relationship, whether it’s your day-to-day life at home with your partner, your lack of date nights, your sex life, or all of the above. Continue reading 11 Ways to Combat Boredom in a Relationship

Is Your “Situationship” Harming Your Mental Health?

young guy hugging young girl

More than friends but less than a relationship, we’ve seen it time and again in our own lives and in pop culture. A fictional “situationship” from one of my favorite movies — Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher in No Strings Attached — instantly comes to my mind when I think of this topic. The storyline of the movie (highly recommend if you haven’t yet seen it), takes you through a friendship that becomes more than just friends, but then not exactly your typical monogamous relationship either. The movie ends in (spoiler alert) the two falling in love and living happily ever after.

Unfortunately, reality is hardly ever like it is in the movies.

Continue reading Is Your “Situationship” Harming Your Mental Health?

3 Tips to Not Lose Your Sense of Self in a Relationship

man lost in maze

Have you ever had a friend who becomes a chameleon anytime they are dating someone new? Maybe it happens overnight, or maybe you’ve watched them slowly fade away throughout a long-term partnership. Maybe it’s you.

Losing yourself in a relationship often happens before we even realize what’s taking place. One day you’re you, and the next you’re staring in the mirror, barely able to recognize the shadow of yourself you’ve become.

Sometimes it takes a trusted friend or counselor to help us see these changes from an objective, caring perspective. Other times, it dawns suddenly on a person: they don’t recognize themselves anymore. Continue reading 3 Tips to Not Lose Your Sense of Self in a Relationship