Dating

After countless swipes left and right (mostly left), blind dates, speed dates, awkward dates, always-only-first dates, you’ve met someone you think is wonderful — and he or she seems to think you’re wonderful back. Eventually, neither of you wants to live without each other, so you’re ready to go all in and make a firm commitment.

This is exciting, but it can also be terrifying. After all, finding and committing to the right partner is one of the most important decisions you’ll make in your lifetime. To make sure you don’t lose yourself in the butterflies and giddiness — and instead create a foundation that’s grounded in an understanding that will guide you and your partner throughout your relationship — it’s essential to ask your partner and yourself some questions before taking the next step. Continue reading 6 Questions You Need to Ask Before Committing to Someone

When you’re in a new relationship, your hormones are racing and the newness of your love can be intoxicating. It can be tempting to feel like you have met your “soulmate,” the one person who is made for you and only you.

Even though this idea is very appealing and romantic, there are also down sides to thinking this way. The soul mate paradigm can raise your expectations to an impossible level, ironically making you feel less satisfied with your partner overall. Continue reading Is the Idea of a Soulmate Bad for Your Relationship and Mental Health?

When you’re in the beginning stages of a relationship, it’s easy for everything to seem perfect and for your partner to appear flawless. You probably romanticize everything they do and can’t get them out of your head. “Early feels” are usually characterized by a whole lot of infatuation, and it can be difficult to distinguish if what you feel is the “real deal.”

The beginning of a relationship is likely when you feel the most chemistry drawing you and your partner together, making you feel like you’re on cloud nine. The struggle for an ongoing relationship that lasts – the real deal – is finding a balance between chemistry and consistency to keep the relationship strong. But how do you determine if what you’re feeling is more than just sparks and if it’s a relationship worth pursuing? Continue reading Is It Real?: Honeymoon Phase vs. Real Deal Feels

For as long as I can remember having interest in boys, I’ve been chasing them. I chase endlessly — the guys who won’t text me back, the guys who I know don’t want a relationship, the guy who barely know I exist. There’s one guy who I literally chased on and off from ages 14 to 23. Seriously. 9 years! And yet when winning someone’s affection is easy, it’s…not as exciting. And I’m probably far from alone in feeling this.

For many people (self included, obviously) being addicted to the dating chase is very much a pattern and a bad habit. We may overlook the good that we have right in front of us because we’re too focused on feeling the rush of the pursuit or moving onto the next new, exciting thing. Continue reading Why We’re Addicted to the “Dating Chase” (and How to Stop)

It would be nice if every relationship had a straight 50/50 power dynamic split…but those in relationships will tell you that’s probably not the case in their partnership. Relationships should be about a shared, equal bond, where partners are teammates who make compromises and share power, rather than a coach versus team member dynamic. Right?

Continue reading When One Person Controls the Relationship

The night of my first date with my ex, I felt strong, instant chemistry. The butterflies in my stomach felt more like large birds, and each kiss felt like 4th of July fireworks. Actually, even just looking at him made me feel fireworks!

We became official, and from there…it went downhill. Why? We were lacking consistency and things that came along with it, like trust. Once I wasn’t so blinded by chemistry, I realized we weren’t compatible and there were aspects of the relationship that were not healthy. When it came down to it, we wanted different things in life. There were parts of him I could not accept and parts of me that he could not accept. Continue reading Chemistry or Consistency: What Makes for a Better Relationship

Nobody is immune to rejection. Even the most beautiful and talented people have been rejected in one way or another. When you take risks in life, you face the possibility that you might be shut down or might not make the cut.

Continue reading Why Rejection Hurts (and 3 Ways to Dust Yourself Off)