One Key Component to Self Care That You’re Probably Overlooking

Group of friends laughing

One Key Component to Self Care That You’re Probably Overlooking” originally appeared on Fairy God Boss, an advice blog that makes it easier for you to take care of yourself.


You may have read or been told five times just this year that you’re the combination of the five people you spend the most time around. Motivational Speaker Jim Rohn famously stated this, and the concept has since been popularized throughout the self-help world.

Science and psychology have both supported and refuted the idea, but let’s play with another part of it for just a minute. Regardless of whether you become like the five people you choose to spend the most time, with one thing is clear: you are making a choice to spend your time with them.

Continue reading One Key Component to Self Care That You’re Probably Overlooking

100 Ways You’re Making Your Life Harder Than It Needs to Be

Woman painting at desk

Everybody’s goal should be to work smarter, not harder. I’m not just talking about work work, but I’m also talking about the little things in daily life that add up, making things a whole lot harder than they need to be. And so, I’ve compiled 100 examples — including many things I’m guilty of.

Hopefully, this list will have you nodding your head and saying, “Uh-huh, yup, I do that!” or maybe even, “Oh crap, I’m doing that RIGHT NOW!” so you can realize some “mistakes” you’re making. Some of them are easy fixes, like, wearing pants two sizes too small. Just go out and get a new pair of pants which you can actually breathe in! But some of them are long-term unhealthy habits that will take time to break — like stalking your ex on social media!

Here’s your chance to be honest with yourself and recognize some less-than-ideal behaviors you should work on. Make small steps and start actively reversing the behaviors, creating better habits, making for an easier life. Who doesn’t want that?
Continue reading 100 Ways You’re Making Your Life Harder Than It Needs to Be

The 6 Habits Mentally Fit People Practice

Smiling woman kissing boxing gloves

Physical fitness gets a lot of attention, and for good reason — good physical health can prevent conditions such as heart disease or diabetes, and help you maintain a long, independent life. But often neglected is mental fitness — having a healthy and strong mind to allow you to handle the challenges and opportunities that life puts in front of you.

A common thought is that the absence of a mental health disorder means that a person is mentally fit and emotionally well, but according to Rachel O’Neill, a licensed professional clinical counselor, that’s a dangerous misconception. “An individual can certainly experience periods of stress, discomfort, sadness, or anxiety without necessarily meeting criteria for a mental health disorder,” she said. “Mental wellness is a process, and just like physical health, it’s an ongoing process to maintain mental and emotional wellness.”

Continue reading The 6 Habits Mentally Fit People Practice

6 Things To Do When Your Partner Is Stressed

Couple holding hands on the street

Life is stressful. Work can be demanding, family life can be taxing, and so can our relationships, finances, and health-related struggles. Just turn on the news or open social media and your blood pressure is apt to rise. Really, there are so many things that can be triggers for stress, and we all experience our fair share of them on a daily basis.

Equally stressful is when we watch our partners suffer from heightened periods of stress. It can be upsetting to witness and can even create tension within our relationships. Perhaps the most difficult part is that we desperately want to help, but often feel bewildered about what the best approach might be.

Continue reading 6 Things To Do When Your Partner Is Stressed

5 Reasons Masturbation is Great for De-stressing

Woman with a hand on her skirt and tattoo on leg

While it’s likely that the concept of masturbation was a source of stress when you were younger (because when you’re 11 it’s easy to believe masturbation can, indeed make you go blind), solo sex is great for your health. In fact, the mental health benefits of masturbation are so bountiful that I’d go so far as to claim masturbation is self-care.

If you’re not already masturbating regularly, you might want to add it into your routine (Ugh! What a horrible chore!) Aside from making you feel great, masturbation is great tool for de-stressing. Not convinced yet? Here are some ways masturbation helps you calm down.

Continue reading 5 Reasons Masturbation is Great for De-stressing

How to be Resilient: The Art of the Bounceback

Two women with arms up in front of sunset

At some point in your life, something bad is bound to happen to you. This isn’t pessimism, this is realism. Take a second to think about all the less than ideal things that can possibly happen in life. You might get laid off. You might experience a natural disaster. You might fall very ill. You’re more than likely to experience a break up, or have someone around you die.

Life is a series of ups and downs, and this is a fact we can’t change. What we can change, though, is how we react to the negative situations which arise, and perhaps even more importantly, how we bounce back. Let’s talk about resilience.

Continue reading How to be Resilient: The Art of the Bounceback

How Successful People Handle 3 Types of Toxic Coworkers

Young African-American woman works at desk in airy office space

How Successful People Handle 3 Types of Toxic Coworkers” originally appeared on Fairygodboss, an online career community for women, by women. 

Every workplace is filled interesting personalities —including frustrating ones.

If you feel like you’re surrounded by difficult people at the office — perhaps people who talk too much or a micromanaging boss — take heart, because you’re not alone. Studies have found that one in eight people leave a job due to problems with co-workers.

Since we spend more time at work than at home (and quitting tomorrow isn’t an option for most people), it’s worthwhile to figure out ways to get along.

Continue reading How Successful People Handle 3 Types of Toxic Coworkers

8 Ways Being Single is Great for Your Mental Health

Attractive black man doing exercise at sunset

Let’s get one thing straight: Being single doesn’t mean you’re going to be forever alone. If nothing else, being single is a learning experience — one that happens to be good for your mental health, believe it or not.

So stop stressing over those seemingly endless (and cliché) “I SAID YES!” posts everyone shares on Instagram, and start appreciating the benefits of single life. Here are some ways being single is actually beneficial to your mental well-being.

Continue reading 8 Ways Being Single is Great for Your Mental Health

A Guide to Setting Healthy Boundaries in Relationships

Palm of hand extended outward signaling stop

“Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.” —Antoine de Saint-Exupery

This quote encapsulates what most healthy relationships really look like — two individuals who support each other on their distinct journeys, rather than two people who become lost in one another. Much of this comes down to having and maintaining clear boundaries, even within a romantic relationship.

It may seem obvious, but what are boundaries, really?

Continue reading A Guide to Setting Healthy Boundaries in Relationships

The Psychology of the Orgasm Gap

Man and woman embracing at home

We know that women face a number of challenges to achieving equality. In the boardroom, we face the wage gap. And in the bedroom: The orgasm gap.

Researchers (and everyday people!) have found that a gap exists between the frequency with which men and women experience orgasm, especially during heterosexual sex. Specifically, women consistently have fewer orgasms than their male partners.

Continue reading The Psychology of the Orgasm Gap